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Is Suicide The Unforgivable Sin?

Is Suicide The Unforgivable Sin?

I love travel documentaries and one of my favourites has been, “Parts Unknown” on CNN hosted by Anthony Bourdain. You can imagine my surprise when I first heard that Anthony was found dead by suicide Friday June 8th2018. According to his mother, Anthony had everything to live for. “He is absolutely the last person in the world I would have ever dreamed would do something like this,” Gladys Bourdain told the New York Times.

Another celebrity, Kate Spade, sounded happy the night before her body was found in her New York City apartment earlier the same week as Bourdain. “There was no indication and no warning she would do this,” her husband Andy Spade said in a heart-wrenching statement published in the Times.

For more than four decades Antoon Leenaars has tried to construct a theory to explain why people kill themselves. Among his findings is that those who die by suicide are often tragically gifted at concealing their true intentions, even from themselves. “We find it in the suicide notes and in the psychological autopsies,” said Leenaars, a Windsor psychologist whose archive of more than 2,000 suicide notes is believed the largest collection of its kind in the world. “There’s both a conscious and unconscious intent to be deceptive, to hide, to mask,” he said.

I think that’s why, for the most part, we are often surprised when someone takes their own life. I haven’t personally experienced a close friend or family member commit suicide, yet I have been around many others who have had close friends or family take their lives, and I can tell you that it can be terribly confusing and heartbreaking, sometimes to the point of questioning what they currently believed about God. In fact, just today I learned of someone who had been heavily involved in the local church recently abandon his faith because of the confusion and grief experienced when one of his children took their life.

For the friends and family of that person who has taken their own lives, grief can be like a wild animal inside, thrashing to get out. There are times It won’t be contained, spilling out in sobs and screams, while at other times it turns inward, causing those left behind to desperately examine every interaction over the weeks and days preceding their loved one’s death, wondering what they could have done differently. It’s a terrible place to be.

Does the bible say anything about committing suicide?

Is suicide the unforgivable sin? Does the person who self-kills go immediately to hell? Within the church community, this controversial topic has unfortunately often been addressed in emotional ways, not through biblical analysis. For example, for those who grew up Roman Catholic the prevailing view is that suicide is definitely a mortal sin, irretrievably sending people to hell. Influenced by the arguments of Augustine and Aquinas, this belief dominated through the Reformation. This of course causes much angst and problems for the survivor to process through. As a result, the approach is most often an emotional one. Besides this traditional position of the Catholic Church, we encounter three others:

1) A true Christian would never commit suicide since God wouldn’t allow it.

2) A Christian may commit suicide but would lose his salvation.

3) A Christian may commit suicide without losing his salvation.

As purposeful as those statements are, we still need to ask what the Bible, not tradition or opinion says. As much as we don’t have all the answers, let’s begin by talking about those truths we do know as revealed in God’s Word.

We know that humanity is totally depraved (Isaiah 64:6; Romans 3:10-18). Of course, we should understand that this doesn’t mean we’re as evil as we could be, but rather that every human capacity – intellect, heart, emotions, will – is tainted by sin. We also know that even after regeneration, a Christian is capable of committing any sin except the unforgiveable one. We see the unforgivable sin mentioned in Mark 3:25-32 and Matthew 12:32. A study of these passages leads us to the conclusion that they are referring to the continual rejection of the Holy Spirit in the work of conversion, ultimately referring to a committed unbeliever.

I think that it’s important to remember as well, that a believer is quite capable of taking the life of someone else, as David did in the case of Uriah, without this action invalidating his salvation. After all, Christ’s sacrifice on the cross has forgiven all of our sin – past, present, and future (Colossians 2:13-14; Hebrews 10:11-18). Still, suicide is a serious offense against God because it represents arrogant violation of the gift of life the Creator has given. However, if a genuine believer is theoretically capable of taking another’s life, why is it impossible to conceive he or she could ever take his or her own?

The truth is that the sin a Christian will commit tomorrow was forgiven at Calvary – where Jesus justified us, declaring us positionally righteous. He accomplished this work through one single offering that didn’t need to be repeated again. On the cross Jesus didn’t make us justifiable; he made us justified (Romans 3:23-26; 8:29-30).

Granted, some point out that Scripture contains no instance of a believer committing suicide, while it includes many cases of unbelievers doing so, thus coming to the conclusion that believers simply don’t (won’t) commit suicide. But this is an argument from silence. Scripture doesn’t explicitly mention many things in life. Moreover, some hold suicide robs a Christian of her salvation because it doesn’t provide an opportunity for repentance. But if you were to die right now, would there be any unconfessed sin in your life? I think that we could only say that yes, of course there would be.

The sacrifice that covers the unconfessed sins we have remaining until death is the same sacrifice that would cover a sin like suicide. Suicide is not what determines whether a person gains entrance into heaven anyways. If an unsaved person commits suicide, she has done nothing but “expedite” her journey to hell. However, that person who committed suicide will ultimately be in hell for rejecting salvation through Christ, not because she committed suicide. “Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only Son of God.” – John 3:18

We should also point out, however, that no one truly knows what was happening in a person’s heart the moment he died. Some people have “deathbed conversions” and accept Christ in the moments before death. It is possible that Anthony Bourdain could have had a last-second change of heart and cry out for God’s mercy, we don’t know, but if he did, we can know that God’s mercy would have reached him even there.

Back to our original question. Is suicide the unforgivable sin? If we’ve established that a Christian is capable of committing any sin, why can’t we conceive that someone could commit the sin of suicide? And if we believe Jesus’ blood is capable of forgiving any sin, wouldn’t his blood cover this sin too? The wonderful truth of the matter is that if Jesus’ sacrifice has made believers perfect forever (look up Hebrews 7:28-10:14), could any sin remove their salvation? Based on scripture, I’d have to say a resounding no – including suicide.

Further to this point, if someone like Moses (and Job, and Elijah, and Jeremiah) came to a point where he wished God would take his life, couldn’t a believer with schizophrenia or extreme depression, who lacks Moses’ strength of character, make this wish a reality? Martin Luther believed that a true believer could be oppressed by demonic powers and thus driven to the point of suicide. The suicide of a believer is evidence that anyone can struggle with despair and that our enemy, Satan, is “a murderer from the beginning” – John 8:44

Having said that, on the basis of Scripture, history, and the experience of God’s people – as well as the indwelling Spirit and the means of grace in the church – it’s most likely that suicides will be rare (though not impossible) for genuine believers.

How should we respond to a survivor? 

Even still, when a suicide does occur, we should seek to comfort, not accuse. Instead of identifying the horrors we should seek to comfort the hurting. Our chief focus should be on that about which God has said much (salvation), not on that about which he’s said little (suicide).

Sometimes the best thing we can say to a survivor (friend or family member of someone who took their own life) is NOTHING! In fact, sometimes the best reaction is no words at all, but a hug. There is much comfort that comes with the caring presence of friends, and the assurance others are praying for them. Even still, if you do feel led to say anything, here are some examples you can use that I have found helpful as I have come along side those who are hurting.

“Tell me a favourite memory of…”

“I love you, and my prayers are with you.”

“How can I help you today?” (Following through with errands, grocery shopping, cleaning, going to church with them, etc.)

“I am so sorry for your loss. Words fail.”

“I’m here.”

The best advice to anyone who wants to comfort a suicide survivor is: “Show up, let them see you care, and respect the griever’s right to feel bad for a while (guilt, anger, sadness, etc.). Too many survivors reported “friends” who avoided them altogether after their loved ones’ suicides rather than to risk saying the wrong thing. Please don’t do that, because that hurts most of all.

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Assisted Suicide: Blessing or Curse?

Mary Kills People’ is a Canadian TV series set around the life of Dr. Mary Harris, an overworked single mother and ER doctor who also moonlights as an underground angel of death – working outside the law assisting patients who want to die on their own terms. The story follows Mary who has managed to stay under the radar but business is booming, and her double life is getting complicated.

It’s too early to see how popular (or not) this television series will be as it only aired its first show January 28, 2017, but the cultural move to accept assisted suicide is gaining momentum. If that’s the case then it won’t be very long until many, if not all of us, will be faced with the option of assisted suicide in our own lives or at least with someone close to us.

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Proponents of assisted suicide contend that this ‘right’ allows the patient to leave this earth with dignity, save their families from financial ruin, and relieve them of insufferable pain. They claim that giving competent, terminally-ill adults this necessary right is to give them the autonomy to close the book on a life well-lived.

Those opposed come back with arguments that say that assisted suicide endangers the weak and vulnerable, gives societal approval to killing, pressures dying people to end their own lives, and potentially turns doctors into killers, as former US Surgeon General C. Everett Koop alluded to, when he warned that the practice of medicine “cannot be both our healer and our killer” – (KOOP, The Memoirs of America’s Family Doctor by C. Everett Koop, M.D., Random House, 1991).

The fact remains however that we are living in a day and an age which is sometimes referred to as a “culture of death.” Abortion on demand has been practised for decades and even some are seriously proposing infanticide. Now assisted suicide is being presented as a viable option to be embraced in society.

Understandably it is not easy to broach this subject with someone who is suffering and sees death as a release. The truth is that death is an unnatural ripping apart of body and spirit, so of course there will be strong emotions and opinions one way or the other and endless positions in between. But it is important to not solely choose our ‘position’ based on sympathy or empathy, we must also consider what the word of God says about life along with considering where assisted suicide will (potentially) lead as well as begin to grasp just how God’s sovereignty fits into all this.

1)  God’s Word must be considered

The word of God tells us clearly that life is a gift from God. Adam became a living being by the breath of God. “Then God said, ‘Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.’ So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.” – Genesis 1:26-27

Since life is a gift to mankind it is then clear that life belongs to God. In other words we mortals do not have absolute autonomy over our own lives but are stewards of the life given to us by God. That being the case it means then that the lives of all humans, both their own and others’, need to be valued and protected. Consequently, the person who takes the life of another will be held accountable. The sixth commandment, “You shall not murder.” – Exodus 20:13 is clear about this.

This focus on death as an answer to the world’s problems is a total reversal of the biblical model. Death is called an enemy that will be destroyed, “The last enemy to be destroyed is death.” – 1 Corinthians 15:26 and throughout scripture it is presented as a curse. On the other hand, it doesn’t take long to read in the scriptures (Genesis 2:7) that life is a sacred gift from God. It’s quite clear that assisted suicide spurns the gift while embracing the curse.

2) Societal consequences must be considered

Not only are there biblical considerations, there are also societal considerations. In countries where assisted suicide has been made legal, euthanasia (different from assisted suicide in that a doctor directly acts – such as via lethal injection) has expanded in a way that was unpredicted when they began. The number of “mercy killings” in Belgium rose 27 percent in 2014, to five killings per day on average. Belgium also allows terminally ill children of any age to request to be euthanized.

In due course someone has to decide who can choose to die and many questions will need to be raised in the process. Who should be included; children, the mentally ill, those physically disabled? Only those who are terminal, what about those who aren’t terminal but aren’t enjoying a certain quality of life (& who deems what level of quality is acceptable)? Should the cost to our medical system of keeping someone alive become a factor in determining whether they should be allowed to die? When Britain was considering assisted-suicide legislation, Dutch ethicist Theo Boer reportedly told the House of Lords, “Don’t do it, Britain. . . . Some slopes are truly slippery.”

3) God’s sovereignty must be considered

If we believe that God is merely an uninterested force or deity in our day to day lives then there is no need to submit to his (or its) non-existent plan. However if we believe in a God who is active in the lives of mankind, is in control over the affairs of history, and is in fact is seeking our very best with a plan to renew a lost relationship with him, then we can trust what he says about life and death and about the circumstances we find ourselves in.

Death is inevitable for us mere mortals. Of course, allowing death to occur naturally in a terminally ill person is not necessarily wrong, but actively hastening death is. Beginning to understand God’s sovereignty is an opportunity to learn to trust him. In the end, God alone is sovereign over when and how a person’s death occurs. “I know you will bring me down to death, to the place appointed for all the living.”- Job 30:23. And, “No man has power over the wind to contain it; so, no one has power over the day of his death.” – Ecclesiastes 8:8.

It’s a tough assignment to speak up against society’s move toward assisted suicide. Those conversations we have with coworkers in the lunch room are often clouded by the emotion we share: sympathy for people facing terminal illnesses. We don’t want them to suffer and in fact want to help. But the truth remains, choosing suicide at any point is the same sin Adam and Eve committed in the garden: the pride of wanting to be (like) God. Ultimately, assisted suicide is another way that man attempts to usurp authority from God, but if you are one of those (as I am) who believe in the sovereignty of God and in his word to direct our choices, then we can only come to the conclusion that God must be the one to have the final say over death.