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To Ink Or Not To Ink – What Does The Bible Say?

Tattoos are more popular than ever. Currently one in five Canadian adults has at least one tattoo. Entertainers, professional athletes, and even a 2009 version of Barbie, have multiple, and very visible, tattoos.

Traditionally, In the North American culture, tattoos were the domain of sailors, bikers, and entertainers. Today, many others sport tattoos… including professionals, business leaders and even many pastors. With such prevalence and interest, the question rightfully asked is, “What dos the Bible say about tattoos?”   

The short answer is… nothing. At least nothing conclusive. In fact, the New Testament is completely silent about whether or not a believer should get a tattoo (at least directly). The only verse that identifies ‘tattoos’ is found in the Old Testament law which commanded the Israelites, “Do not cut your bodies for the dead or put tattoo marks on yourselves. I am the LORD” – Leviticus 19:28

Some immediately condemn all tattooing as immoral because of this passage in Leviticus, arguing that this issue is pretty straightforward based on the direct mention of ‘tattoo’. Others, however, say that this passage no longer applies to us because it’s Old Testament law.

So, how do we handle such a ‘current’ issue? Though believers today are not under the Old Testament law, the fact that there was a command in any form against tattoos at all should raise some questions at the very least.

At first glance the Levitical passage seems to indicate that tattoos are forbidden for Christians. But to comprehend Scripture correctly, we must always examine the whole of Scripture and look at the particular context of any given passage. In connection with the surrounding verses, and in context with the historical setting at the time of its writing, Leviticus 19:28 is part of a larger passage of scripture.

 “You shall keep my statutes. You shall not let your cattle breed with a different kind. You shall not sow your field with two kinds of seed, nor shall you wear a garment of cloth made of two kinds of material. You shall not eat any flesh with the blood in it. You shall not interpret omens or tell fortunes. You shall not round off the hair on your temples or mar the edges of your beard. You shall not make any cuts on your body for the dead or tattoo yourselves: I am the Lord. Do not profane your daughter by making her a prostitute, lest the land fall into prostitution and the land become full of depravity. You shall keep my Sabbaths and reverence my sanctuary: I am the Lord. Do not turn to mediums or necromancers; do not seek them out, and so make yourselves unclean by them: I am the Lord your God.” – Leviticus 19:19, 26–31

In this passage God is speaking to his covenant people Israel. He is specifically telling them to stay away from the religious practices of the surrounding people groups. The prohibited religious practices in these verses include eating bloody meat, fortune telling, certain haircuts related to the priests of false cults, cutting or marking the body for dead relatives, cultic prostitution and consulting psychics. When read in context, we can see that this passage is not one of body décor but one of marking oneself in connection with cultic religious worship.

Still some may argue that tattoos are wrong because it modifies the body which somehow defiles God’s creation. However, if this was the case then we’d need to condemn ear piercing, cutting hair, hair colouring, clipping nails, getting a tan, weight loss, makeup, plastic surgery or possibly orthodontia among other things. Each of the previously mentioned practices modifies the way we were originally created, some permanently.

Having said that, in 1 Peter we do have this command. “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” – 1 Peter 3:3-4

Granted, this passage is directed at women, but there is a principle here that may be apropos: namely, a person’s external appearance should not be the focus of our attention. Much effort goes into “elaborate hairstyles” and “fine clothes” and jewelry, but that’s not where a woman’s true beauty lies. In the same way, tattoos and body piercings are “outward adornment,” and we should be careful to give more effort to the development of the “inner self”.

Even still, the law is the law, isn’t it?

A lot of confusion comes from the misunderstanding between moral law and ceremonial law. The moral law encompasses regulations on justice, respect, and sexual conduct. Much of the moral law was carried forward and affirmed in the New Testament church. That is why we would still commit to things such as sexual purity or value life because we see them adhered to in the New Testament.

Ceremonial law on the other hand includes instructions on regaining right standing with God through sacrifices and other ceremonies regarding “uncleanness”, remembrances of God’s work in Israel such as feasts and festivals, specific regulations meant to distinguish Israelites from their pagan neighbours such as dietary, adornment (tattoos and ear piercings) and clothing restrictions, and certain signs that point to the coming Messiah like the Sabbath, circumcision, Passover, and the redemption of the firstborn.

Christians are not bound by ceremonial law. Since the church is not the nation of Israel, circumcision is not required. As well, memorial festivals, such as the Feast of Weeks and Passover, or adornment restrictions such as tattoos do not apply.

The Apostle Paul goes on to remind us that the Old Testament Law was designed by God to lead people to Jesus. Now that Jesus has come and set us free, we are now not under the law in order to be in good standing with God. Our right standing before God comes from placing our trust in Jesus’ death on the cross to pay for our debts, not on following the Old Testament regulations.

 “So then, the law was our guardian until Christ came, in order that we might be justified by faith. But now that faith has come, we are no longer under a guardian.” – Galatians 3:24–25

 If we were to obey the laws of the Old Testament today, we would be bound by rules that would restrict shellfish, pork eating and hipster hairstyles. We’d also be hard pressed to find anyone who would wear clothing mixed of two different materials, or unconcerned if the Angus beef they’d been eating had been bred with a Devon cow. Simply put, declaring that tattoos are out of bounds for a believer are putting themselves back under slavery to the law.

Further to that, getting inked today isn’t something the average wearer gets to link themselves to cultic worship practices, tattoos today are mainly for ornamentation. The tattoo of today can describe images that merely please the wearer, or have deeper meaning to the owner.

Many Christians today are tattooing themselves not in tribute to a false idol or anti-Christian deity, but with love for the one true God and Creator. It is seen as a way of giving glory to God in that ‘Christian’ themed tattoos attract questions about faith to those who aren’t convinced yet. Certainly, having a tattoo saying “Jesus saves” could indeed be a conversation starter with some people who would never approach a preacher wearing a suit and tie.

In 1 Corinthians we read, “I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. I do all this for the sake of the gospel.” – 1 Corinthians 9:22-23

If having a tattoo genuinely opens doors for evangelism that would otherwise be closed, getting a ‘Christian’ tattoo would likely “qualify” under Paul’s “becoming all things” qualification.

However, while artistic self-expression can be OK, our primary motive for anything we do should be to glorify God. This means seeking to honour and draw attention to him, not ourselves. Getting a tattoo for purposes of witness may be acceptable, but remember, this is not the primary or most effective way to evangelize. It is in no way a substitute for verbally communicating the gospel. You are not fulfilling the Great Commission simply because you have a tattoo of a Bible verse.

With this said, while there may be no clear passage in the Bible addressing getting or not getting inked, this is hardly a license for unrestrained tattooing. You still need to think before you ink, especially if you’re a Christian. The following are guiding questions to help you think through your decision.

  • If I live with my parents, would my parents support my decision? Would I be defying the authority God gave my parents over me at my current age? If it is in rebellion to parents, it is clearly not acceptable, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honour your father and mother” – which is the first commandment with a promise – so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” – Ephesians 6:1-3
  • Would I still want this particular image when I get older?
  • What if my future mate wouldn’t like having to see this image for a lifetime?
  • Will employers want to hire you? Numerous companies don’t want your tattoo to be visible, and it can actually prevent you from being hired. Many employers will restrict your tattoos, requiring you to cover them up because they are not socially acceptable from a business standpoint.
  • Would this tattoo be in an area of my body that would be plainly visible? – Many people do unfairly judge people with tattoos as being “second-class.”
  • What is it about yourself that you want to communicate to the world? Tattoos are powerful messages, automatically conveying what you value. They are nearly permanent and will likely be with you for life. A growing experience with tattoos is what has officially been termed, “tattoo regret.” As you mature, you may, like increasing numbers of people, regret your tattoos because you have outgrown their messages and changed your values.
  • Would this image bring God glory?
  • Do I feel fully convinced that tattoos are allowable for Christians?
  • Is it a wise use of money? “In America, you can expect a basic price of $80 to $100 an hour…very few shops will ever touch you for less than $40” (tattooinfo.net). We are responsible to God for how we use our money. It’s also important to keep in mind that the removal technologies being developed are even more expensive than the cost of getting a tattoo in the first place.
  • Medical concerns. There are real health risks with tattoos. The Mayo Clinic warns, “don’t take tattooing lightly”. They’ve resulted in severe allergic reactions, infections, unsightly scars, and blood-borne diseases like Hepatitis B and C. Tattooing deliberately opens skin and exposes your blood to unknown bacteria. Tattoo parlors are not medical clinics, although they are puncturing skin and exposing blood.

Please, don’t make this decision hastily or rashly. Getting a tattoo is not for everyone, and is certainly not for a Christian who feels unconvinced that getting a tattoo is completely Biblical. In this and many areas of the Christian life there are many truly excellent believers who have varying degrees of agreement and disagreement about Christians with tattoos. In whatever you believe about this issue I hope that you will leave gracious space for others who might feel differently.

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New Year’s Resolution – No More Photobombing Jesus

Common New Year’s resolutions would be commitments to quit smoking, to stop drinking, to manage money more wisely, and to spend more time with family. By far, the most common New Year’s resolution is to lose weight, in conjunction with exercising more and eating more healthily. These are all good goals to set.

This year though I am making a new Year’s resolution you’ll probably not find in a top ten list anywhere. I’m going to quit ‘photobombing’ Jesus. As I have pondered the past year… for that matter the past few years, I have discovered that I have a repeatable tendency to try and photobomb Jesus. I say ‘try’ because Jesus can never actually be photobombed… but it seems I try just the same.

For those who aren’t familiar with the term ‘photobomb’, the dictionary’s definition is: “To spoil a photograph of (a person or thing) by unexpectedly appearing in the camera’s field of view as the picture is taken, typically as a prank or practical joke.” In other words, trying to take away the glory moment from the other person.

I photobomb Jesus when I serve God with mixed motives. When I hope lost people will be saved – but I want to be the evangelist God used, I photobomb Jesus. When I desire Christians to be encouraged – but I want to be the instrument of edification, I photobomb Jesus. When I want people to think God was awesome, that is of course a good thing. But when I want them to think that I was too – well that’s doing the photobomb thing again. Get the idea?

Having said that, it’s not a wrong thing to want to be part of what God is doing – we’re created for this purpose as Paul speaks to the church in Ephesus, “For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” – Ephesians 2:10

Jesus even said that It’s not wrong to want people to see God glorified in your life. “In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that  they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.” – Matthew 5:16

If we need more convincing listen to Peter tell us that It’s actually a good thing to serve with the hope that people will be convicted of their sin and trust in Christ because of your good works being recognized. “Keep your conduct among the Gentiles honorable, so that when they speak against you as evildoers, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day of visitation.” – 1 Peter 2:12

So, it appears that God’s Word shows us that it’s wrong and even sinful if you don’t desire these things since that should be a part of a sanctified life. God being glorified through me is the height of my created purpose, but there’s a fine line between wanting God to use you for his glory and wanting everyone to know about it. We must pay careful attention to our hearts so we don’t seek to steal glory from Jesus.

What does that look like then? What does a photobomb look like in the realm of discipleship? Probably best to use examples in my own life since I’m the one making this particular New Year’s resolution.

I must admit that there have been times as a preacher where I’ve left a great Sunday service only to feel discouraged because I didn’t hear someone tell me, “That was the most amazing message I’ve ever heard.”

As I thought about why I felt that way, I realized that I was seeking satisfaction in my efforts. However, true useful servants are those who find their satisfaction in simply serving, even when no one affirms them, as long as Jesus gets the applause. Problem is that when I seek affirmation to be satisfied, not only will I not find my satisfaction realized, but I also end up stealing from Jesus.

And then adding insult to injury, I have found that photobombing Jesus for attention often leads to a depressed devotional life. As an example, when I become more concerned about my public performance than my private devotion I neglect my prayer life, because other things feel more pressing. Photobombers feel hurried out of the prayer closet because we value being before men more than before God.

Continuing on in my public transparency, I have seen where photobombing has presented occasions where I have become discouraged and even bitter when God has used others instead of me for what I thought were my goals.

Stepping into my role as ‘rookie’ lead pastor a few years ago, I knew that God was going to grow his church. What I didn’t expect was that numerical growth wasn’t going to happen in the specific location I was a part of. God had other plans which ultimately, I saw and gave him praise for, however during that time, another church down the road grew like nobody’s business.

Though I loved the pastor of that ‘other’ fellowship, I’ll admit that I became bitter. I felt discouraged because I felt that God had “overlooked” me. Hadn’t I spent enough time in prayer? I had even fasted; didn’t that count for something? I must say that this season was a good time to re-evaluate why I served Jesus.

Looking at John the Baptist, you quickly realize that he would never have been accused of photobombing. Crowds flocked to John, but he had one mission – to make Jesus known. “He must increase, but I must decrease.” John was content serving in the background so that Jesus could be seen more clearly.

Jesus said, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake and the gospel’s will save it.’” – Mark 8:34-35 

…And, “Whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me.” – Matthew 10:38

When the Roman Empire crucified a criminal or captive, the victim was often forced to carry his cross part of the way to the crucifixion site, often through the heart of the city. The picture Jesus gives is of a man or woman, already condemned, required to carry the beam of his or her own cross to the place of execution.

Disciples from Galilee knew what this meant, since hundreds had been executed by this means in their region. The modern equivalent would be to walk down a hallway toward an electric chair. Death in this case is the obvious destination, and so the idea is that in this life of submission to Jesus, we are in reality in a death processional.

In other words, if we “deny ourselves”, and commit ourselves to death, we can no longer place any hope in this world. By “taking up our cross”, it is as if all our natural passions and desires are doomed, giving up any claim for our self and selfish wants and needs.

Paul said, “I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” – Romans 12:1-2

What was Paul saying here? It’s only as we give everything up… only as we allow our self to be sacrificed are we able to be changed. Dead people don’t make very good photobombers.

My New Year’s resolution for 2018 then is to live a life that is dying to know Christ and then living to make him known in a photobomb free zone.

Jesus came to save photobombers like me from ourselves. In fact, he gave up his own glory and then died for all the times we steal God’s glory. He alone is worthy of praise in 2018 and into eternity.

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What Is The True Spirit Of Christmas?

It doesn’t take very long to notice that Christmas is only one week away (unless you don’t own a radio, TV, have no friends and never step a foot outside your door). Everywhere you look you can’t help but see the lights, decorations, and store front signs declaring great deals to entice the dollars out of one’s pocket in order to ‘help’ celebrate the spirit of Christmas.

But what is the spirit of Christmas – really? Is it about turkey and stuffing? Is it about presents and family? Is it about time off from work and the start of the World Junior Hockey tournament? Go Canada! Or is it something more?

If you asked the average person on the street, you may hear answers such as the spirit being about generosity, giving, kindness, world peace, or that it’s a general feeling of emotional goodness to everyone at least once in the year.

I don’t know if I’d necessarily disagree with any of those sentiments but I would have to say that they have only given a glimpse into the true spirit of Christmas. That’s because I believe it’s all about a gift from God which includes parts of those other answers but is so much more as well.

I really think that because the nativity story has become so familiar to many of us it’s easy to forget how profound this gift from God really is. We receive Christmas cards that contain simple, yet startling phrases that should help us recapture the awe of this season yet often they don’t because we have become so used to them, so much so that they’ve lost their impact.

It can be so easy for us to throw around words without taking the time to explain or understand their importance. Words like Emmanuel which means “God with us.” Do we really understand what that means? We sing songs with that word in them, we read cards that use that word, but do we really understand the meaning? Emmanuel literally means, “God is with us”.

That name tells us something amazing about God. He is not some distant deity separated from our daily struggles; rather he uses that name to tell us a very special & deeply meaningful message. What is that message?

Well… if you were to ask me, “Steve, what is your favourite Christmas passage?” I would have to say that other than the Luke passage it’d have to be the chapter three passage that’s found in John’s Gospel, and more specifically the following verse. “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, that whosoever believes in him will not perish but will instead have eternal life.” – John 3:16

John is saying that the creator of the cosmos is deeply interested in us, much like a father getting down on his knees to be with his kids on their level. That’s the picture we have in John 3:16 – God bending down and leaning into our lives as he offers the most incredible Christmas gift to us, his kids.

That’s the meaning behind the name Emmanuel. God is with us and keenly interested. He’s with us when we’re lonely or afraid or hurting or worried, even when we’re stuck in our sins. Emmanuel captures the essence of Christmas. In fact, the spirit of Christmas is really the infinite becoming an infant.

The back story to Christmas is that there had been a broken relationship. In the beginning of the human narrative, Adam & Eve broke the one relationship that meant anything, that all other relationships stemmed from – a relationship with God.

There obviously needed to be a reconciliation. Reconciliation entails the coming together of two parties in order to make right what went wrong in the relationship.

The truth of the matter is that our relationship with God was broken, but not because God said the wrong things, or did the wrong things. Rather, it was we who said and did the wrong things. And we’re still saying the wrong things, doing the wrong things, failing to say and do the right things. And we’re all suffering for it. And it all stems from our selfish desires.

If we are honest with ourselves, we know that we live for self. You can call it selfishness, but I like Luther’s way of talking about it – in Latin. Not because I understand Latin, but because it just sounds cool! “Sin”, Luther says, “is INCURVATUS IN SE”, which means ‘to be curved in upon the self’.

The rupture in our relationship with God occurs when we decide that we are independent, autonomous individuals who are quite capable of living life on our own, thank you very much.

And because of that decision we work to make all of life curved in upon self, such that we are holding up our own little world like little Atlases of Greek myth fame. Problem is however that our personal globes are getting very heavy, because our little worlds are too much for us to bear.

If that is where you are at, finding that the weight of your world on your shoulders is much too heavy a burden to bear, then this Christmas I invite you to accept the message of the season.

The message that the baby Jesus came for all who recognize that they are tired of living INCURVATUS IN SE, and who realize that they can’t continue carrying the weight in their own strength and so are now ready to give up all that load they carry and give it to someone (Jesus) who can and will carry it for them if you give up everything for him.

The spirit of Christmas is a proclamation of good news of great joy from God that tells us that we don’t have to live for ourselves anymore and that we don’t need to carry that heavy weight any longer.

“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”  – Isaiah 9:6

Here’s the amazing thing. You see, according to the word of God, we are all sinners which means that left on our own, we would never have sought God because we never would have understood him and would never have recognized him, so he had to come looking for us. That is the inescapable conclusion of the Christmas story.

The Christmas story is about God tracking us down, each and every one of us, to find us and reveal himself to us because he wanted us to know him. Christmas is God coming to us, entering our world, stepping into our time and space because we couldn’t get to him.

He wanted us to know the depth of his love for us, but because words weren’t enough, he came to be with us by taking the form of man, incarnate in the person of Jesus Christ – the Prince of Peace. And as the Prince of Peace we can finally be reconciled with God the father and enjoy peace with him as we were originally created to enjoy.

Over the coming days, focus on and celebrate who Jesus is and all that his coming means. His miraculous birth was the start of something that history will never repeat. And as we are heading toward Christmas day at the end of this very week,  let us focus on the spirit of Christmas – which is only Jesus, which is always Jesus.

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How Can We Forgive When We Can’t?

We all love to pull out the following verse from Matthew when someone doesn’t seem to forgive us and present it to them as if it was written ‘special’ for them. “Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, ‘Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?’ Jesus answered, ‘I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times’.” – Matthew 18:21-22 (NIV)

The reality is that when the shoe is on the other foot we often find It harder to accept that verse as written for ourselves. If truth be told I need to seek forgiveness much more often than I extend it. So, if I expect grace extended to me, I better extend grace to others, easily and willingly.

Still, I can’t think of a more difficult command given in scripture. It goes against our nature. Every pore of our body screams, “No, I won’t do it – I can’t do it!” And then Jesus says, “If you do not forgive, I will not forgive.” We know what is right to do. We even want to do what is right. But we feel paralyzed.

I read a story of Yoko Ono requesting that the anniversary of John Lennon’s death be made into an international day of forgiveness. What a wonderful thought, just imagine (do you like what I did there?). The thing is that Yoko added a disclaimer in the same conversation. She stated that though she wished for an international day, she herself couldn’t be led to absolve the murderer of John.

She herself couldn’t forgive. When it comes to us Christians however, forgiving others is not an option even if we feel we can’t. How can we forgive when faced with that dilemma – how can we forgive when we can’t?

First of all, Jesus gives us a great example of what our hearts should be like in the whole area of forgiveness found in John 13:3-17…

After washing the feet of his disciples, he drops a bombshell on the group, announcing that one of them is going to betray him. Our images of the last supper have largely been shaped by renaissance masters such as DaVinci who portray Jesus sitting at the centre of a long table with six disciples on either side, much like a team photo. But DaVinci got it wrong.

The last supper would have been eaten according to their custom’s and their cultural norms. The practice would have been in the fashion of a Greco-Roman triclinium which meant that the Jesus’ guys would have been reclining on their left hips and elbows, freeing up their right hands to eat from the settings on the floor or on slightly raised tables instead of sitting upright on chairs.

Place settings in this fashion would be shared by three people, where one diner could lean back to place his head on the chest of the person to his left, or if someone was to the right, lean forward into his neighbour’s back if he wanted to share a private word. It was certainly a much more intimate way of breaking bread than what we’re used to.

With that picture in mind imagine that at one point in the meal John leans back into Jesus’ chest to ask him a question. Knowing that Jesus was the host, this would place John in the “best man” position immediately in front of Jesus.

Meanwhile, Mark tells us that Judas shared the third spot in that place setting when he records, “It is one of the twelve, one who is dipping bread into the dish with me.” – Mark 14:20

Given that the spot immediately in front of Jesus was taken up by John, the only spot left was immediately to Jesus’ back, the spot reserved for the guest of honour. And that was where Judas was breaking bread that night. Imagine that! Judas was Jesus’ guest of honour at the last supper. This seating arrangement was equivalent as saying… “I trust you my friend… you’ve got my back.”

Jesus knew who would betray him and yet he continued to extend grace to Judas, even washing his feet and giving him the honoured place at his table. Sadly, Judas was given the chance to repent all the way to the end but didn’t accept it, ultimately refusing Jesus’ amazing grace while leaving the party to carry out his plan of betrayal. When he did this act, he condemned himself.

Here’s my point. Should we not live in the same way as Jesus did with Judas, with those who may have wronged us? Should we not continue to extend grace and forgiveness and love no matter their response to us even if they reject us?

Rebecca Pippert relates the powerful story of the late Corrie ten Boom. This Dutch woman and her family were sent to Auschwitz for hiding Jews in their home during the Second World War. Corrie was a Christian woman and had been invited to speak at a conference in Portland Oregon. This is what she said,

“My name is Corrie ten Boom and I am a murderer.” There was total silence. “You see, when I was in prison camp I saw the same guard day in and day out. He was the one who mocked and sneered at us when we were stripped naked and taken into the showers. He spat on us in contempt, and I hated him. I hated him with every fiber of my being. And Jesus says when you hate someone you are guilty of murder.”

“When we were freed, I left Germany vowing never to return,” Corrie ten Boom continued. “But I was invited back there to speak. I didn’t want to go but I felt the Lord nudging me to. Very reluctantly I went. My first talk was on forgiveness. Suddenly, as I was speaking, I saw to my horror that same prison guard sitting in the audience. There was no way that he would have recognized me. But I could never forget his face, never. It was clear to me from the radiant look on his face while I spoke, that he had been converted since I saw him last. After I finished speaking he came up and said with a beaming smile, ‘Ah, dear sister Corrie, isn’t it wonderful how God forgives?” And he extended his hand for me to shake.

“All I felt as I looked at him was hate. I said to the Lord silently, “There is nothing in me that could ever love that man. I hate him for what he did to me and to my family. But you tell us that we are to love our enemies. That’s impossible for me, but nothing is impossible for you. So, if you expect me to love this man it’s going to have to come from you, because all I feel is hate.”

She went on to say that at that moment she felt nudged to do only one thing: “Put out your hand, Corrie,” the Lord seemed to say. Then she said, “It took all of the years that I had quietly obeyed God in obscurity to do the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. I put out my hand.”

 Then, she said, something remarkable happened. “It was only after my simple act of obedience that I felt something almost like warm oil was being poured over me. And with it came the unmistakable message: ‘Well done, Corrie. That’s how my children behave.’ And the hate in my heart was absorbed and gone. And so, one murderer embraced another murderer, but in the love of Christ.” [Hope Has It’s Reasons p. 189, 190]

There is something deep within fallen human nature that thirsts for revenge and urges retaliation in kind. We just can’t seem to forgive – naturally. Someone seeks forgiveness and I think… “Yeah, but don’t do it again”. In fact, we naturally want to inflict the same type of injury on the one who injured us – an eye for an eye seems only fair. But we must give up on the idea that we are the judge, jury and executioner and instead leave the judging to God.

I’ll admit to you that I have struggled to forgive someone who technically is on the same cosmic level with me and yet have expected God, who is light years above us in the same scale, to forgive me. But for the Christian, forgiving others is not an option. If I can’t forgive I guess the question is whether I am truly trusting in God’s transforming power – in my life and others’.  At the end of the day I need to forgive a human being who is like me with all the faults and weaknesses that come with being a human if I in turn expect God, coming from all his perfection and holiness, to forgive me.

That being the case, just how can I forgive someone when I can’t? Corrie got it right. What is impossible for us is completely possible for God, which is why forgiveness can only come about through the transformational power of God in our lives. We all need to rely on the Holy Spirit to forgive through us. That’s a God job and only God can do God jobs well.

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Why Are Christians So Narrow Minded?

To be accused of being narrow minded is considered to be among the biggest and baddest insults which can be levelled at an individual in our Western culture. The thought is that being narrow-minded implies that one is not open to new ideas because you must obviously think you already know all there is to know. The common fear of having such a ‘rigid mind’ is that some believe that it means one is not open to change because of some deep seeded ignorance, which can only lead to fanaticism. But is this true?

A few years ago, there was an interview between Oprah Winfrey and Tom Cruise about Scientology. Oprah was clearly skeptical of Cruise’s religious beliefs, but she then asked the million dollar question: “You don’t believe Scientology is the only true religion, do you?” 

Of course Cruise answered the question as Oprah would expect, denying that Scientology claimed to be the only true religion, (apparently only conservative evangelical Christians are foolish enough to make such a claim). After making that clarification, it was obvious that Oprah’s tension immediately lessened.

It’s taboo in our modern culture to say that another person’s alternate lifestyle, religion, or different perspective is wrong. However, one exception to that rule seems to stand out, which is that It seems perfectly acceptable to be intolerant of those who claim they know the truth, in particular, evangelical conservative Christianity.

However, whenever you accept one idea over another, you’re simultaneously closing yourself off to that other idea by consequence. Happens all the time and it happens to everybody. In fact, for someone to claim that Christians are narrow minded is in itself a narrow minded view because that individual making that claim believes it to be true and so rejects the counter view that christians are open minded. See the irony? So if I say that 2 + 2 = 5 and you come along and say that no… it equals 4, are you narrow minded? 

Imagine that researchers at McMaster University in Hamilton Canada this very week discovered the ‘pill’ that could instantly cure all forms of cancer, painlessly and 100% effective every single time it was administered. I couldn’t imagine anyone accusing them of hatred or bigotry or of being “cancerphobic” if they made the claim that this was the final and only treatment for cancer that anyone would ever need.

Or imagine you and I in a deep conversation while standing 50 feet away from the edge of an 1500 foot cliff with no guard rails. Suddenly we see a blind boy of about 10 years of age walking slowly toward the edge with no idea of the danger he is in. What if he called out and asked, “Which way should I go?” And I answered, “It doesn’t matter, go any way you like?”

I know for a fact that you’d call me an idiot. If I care about him even in the slightest (as I would because he is a fellow human being), I’d yell at the top of my lungs, “Please stop! Don’t take another step. I’ll come and get you.” And then I’d run over as fast as i could, take him by the hand and lead him to safety. Love compels me to speak the truth and act it out.

Even knowing this, we can tend to get defensive when someone calls us ‘narrow minded’, because it suggests that we aren’t open to ‘new things’, that we are closed to ‘new and innovative’ ideas and as such we are the ‘ignorant ones’ of society.

I think though, that what most people consider being narrow minded is in reality being closed minded, the two often being confused with each other and used interchangeably as though they are the same thing. However, they aren’t the same thing. In fact we should be open minded when it comes to ‘questions’ and to ‘new ideas’, and we should be scientific in much of our approach to life. We are to search things out and to seek out truth. But if those new and innovative ideas lead to wrong choices, or hurtful consequences, or simply a wrong answer (as on that math test), then I’d suggest that being narrow minded is actually the best place to be.

I am not saying that Christians are better, smarter, nicer, more deserving, chose better, or anything else in and of themselves compared to non-Christians. They are Christians only because Jesus, through the Holy Spirit, has given them new hearts of flesh, renewed minds to understand, and new and true eyes to see Jesus for who he is. As a result, It then is natural for those Christians to accept the narrow way that Jesus laid out.

And Jesus’ ways and his words are always narrow, because he never changes. He is the same yesterday, today and forever.  And even when his ways and his words make us feel uncomfortable with our broad ways of thinking,  that should bring us back to focusing all of our attention on him.  Once we have done that, and have been brought back to a place of narrow focus, he opens the eyes of our hearts and we begin to see more broadly (from an eternal perspective) than we ever have before.

So are Christians narrow minded? Absolutely! Jesus said, “Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few.” – Matthew 7:13-14.

If you want to find your way to God, you have to travel the one and only course Jesus laid out for humanity. Other roads might look attractive and might seem like shortcuts, but only one ‘narrow’ road leads to heaven and brings us into a right relationship with God. And the truth is that the Love of Christ should then compel us to let the world hear about our narrow point of view, because in the end, it opens us all up to so much more of what God wishes us to know.

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What Is The Cure For Evil & Suffering?

Why does God allow evil? If God has the power to prevent evil and desires to prevent evil, why does he still allow evil? Why isn’t he doing something about it? If God created the world the way it is today; he wouldn’t be a God of love, but rather an evil God.

These are some of the questions posed, sincerely and not so sincere, by many people. Sometimes they are used to bolster arguments against God and sometimes are asked in a sincere quest to ‘understand’.

We might not have any easy answers (if any at all) about why God allows evil and suffering, but we can know the ultimate cure for evil, suffering and death – his name is Jesus. When asking questions of such importance, I believe that the best place to find answers is found in God’s word. That being the case, let’s look at five truths found in God’s word, that if embraced, will be a source of encouragement for the Jesus follower.

God didn’t create a fallen world

 The first truth to embrace is that God didn’t create the world in the state in which it is now, instead evil came as a result of the selfishness and sinful disobedience of human beings.

The truth of the matter is that God is a God of love and his desire was to create a person and eventually a race that would choose to love him. However genuine love can’t exist unless it’s freely given through free choice. Mankind was given the choice to accept God’s love or to reject it which made evil a very real possibility.

The thing is that if God hadn’t allowed for the possibility of evil, mankind would be serving God out of obligation, not choice. He created us as real human beings with the ability to love and follow him – or not. Unfortunately, we chose the “not,” and brought sin and evil into the picture.

If Adam and Eve had only obeyed God, then they may have lived on earth forever, walking with God, tending the garden, working together, no mosquitos. But after they sinned, they were just not on the same page with God anymore. That’s because God can’t tolerate sin, having no sin within himself.

Maybe we should just blame Adam and Eve for the evil in the world. After all, they blamed each other and the serpent; however, “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” – Romans 3:23

I think that it’s safe to say that, had we been in the garden instead of Adam and Eve, we would have sinned in the same way. Now, because of the fall, the world is chaotic and abnormal. Things are not in the state that they should be in. Nature is not always kind and there is conflict between each other. Health issues, hunger issues, abuse issues… none of these conditions were true before the fall when God created it all good.

God knows what’s best

The arguments go something like this: If God is good, then maybe he isn’t powerful enough to deal with all the evil and injustice in the world since it is still going on. Or, if God is powerful enough to stop wrongdoing, yet all-knowing and so must know about the pain and suffering inflicted, then he must be evil since he’s not doing anything about it, even though he has the capability.

The truth is that God knows what’s best even when we don’t. Although the Bible informs us how and why evil came about, it does not tell us why God allowed it to happen. However, we do know that God is all-wise and all-knowing and that he has reasons for allowing things to happen that go way beyond our understanding.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” – Isaiah 55:8-9

All one has to do is read Job to see that no one understands the depth of wisdom and knowledge possessed by God. We are not his counselor! He does as he pleases and we are left to praise him for what he does!

That would be a good lesson for us all to learn as we go through life. We need to stop trying to figure out the ‘why’ of everything and start simply learning to trust God by faith. He knows what he is doing, we don’t! He sees the future and knows what is best for now and then, we don’t!

God has a plan

In the middle of all the evil and suffering, one thing becomes abundantly clear. God has a plan to redeem fallen mankind. The salvation Jesus provides attests to his goodness and love, “but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” – Romans 5:8

The Bible clearly reveals the devastating effects of sin and the hopelessness of man in solving his own sin problem. Because of this ‘sin situation’ we find ourselves in, a proper understanding of the doctrine of sin is essential to understanding God’s remedy for it.

Jesus called Satan “the ruler of this world” – John 12:31, which means Satan has been allowed a certain amount of authority over this world. The blame for the evil in this world should be placed squarely upon Satan. Much is written about the devil – he comes only to kill, steal, and destroy (John 10:10). He is a fierce enemy and a liar and a murderer.

By contrast, Jesus is the Good Shepherd who gives his life for the sheep. God’s plan was to send his son to earth to die in our place because we could never hope to take care of our sin problem and defeat the devil on our strength, wisdom or terms. It had to be through God’s sinless son.

Though evil is here and it is real, it is temporary because of Jesus. Jesus is Goodness incarnate. Evil will eventually be destroyed. This is the hope that the believer has. After all, our God is the God of justice, and he will one day make all things right (Revelation 21:5). Because of Christ, we have the promise of Romans 16:20, “The God of peace will soon crush Satan under your feet.”

There is a new world coming in which there will be no more tears or pain because all things will be made new. Paradise lost will be paradise regained.

God is delaying for us

Some ask, “That’s all fine and good, but a truly good God would eliminate evil today.” My question is, “But then, are you ready to be eliminated, since you – like me – are to some degree evil?” The truth is that the total annihilation of evil is a part of the plan. There will one day come a time when God will judge the sin in this world and make all things new.

Great news if you are already counted among those who have repented of their sin, but what about those who haven’t yet made things right with God? The great news is the fourth truth to embrace, which is that God is purposely “delaying” in order to allow more time for people to repent so that he will not need to condemn them. God’s desire is that for all of our sakes we would obey him that it might be well with us.

 “Oh, that they had such a heart as this always, to fear me and to keep all my commandments, that it might go well with them and with their descendants forever!” – Deuteronomy 5:29

Instead, what happens is that we choose our own way, and then we blame God for not doing anything about it. That’s the heart of sinful man.

But Jesus came to change our hearts through the power of the Holy Spirit, and he does this for those who will turn from evil and call on him to save them from their sin and its consequences.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” – 2 Corinthians 5:17

Just picture the Sinless One who created everything, willfully hanging on a cross and spilling his blood for the sin of those who put their faith in him. Jesus proves God’s love. “Love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love” – 1 John 4:7-8.

God has experienced suffering

For whatever reason God chose to make man as he is – limited and suffering and subject to evil, pain and death – yet God had the honesty and the courage to take his own medicine. He can demand nothing from man that he has not demanded from himself.

He has himself gone through the whole of human experience, from the trivial irritations of family life and the cramping restrictions of hard work and lack of money to the worst horrors of pain and humiliation, defeat, despair and death. He was born in poverty and died in disgrace and thought it absolutely worthwhile.

Yes, God suffered too. It’s easy to forget that the Holy God of the universe chose, out of love, to humble himself, become one of us, and ultimately to suffer in ways none of us every will (or ever could imagine) in order to purchase our redemption.

As a result, he can not only forgive our sins and freely give us salvation, but also sympathize with all we’re going through.

“Since then we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” – Hebrews 4:14-16

God does prevent and restrain some acts of evil. Thankfully so, because this world would be MUCH WORSE were not for God restraining evil. At the same time, God has given us the ability to choose good and evil, and when we choose evil, he allows us, and those around us, to suffer the consequences of evil.

So in the end, rather than blaming God and questioning him on why he doesn’t prevent or eliminate all evil, we should be about the business of proclaiming the cure for evil and its consequences – Jesus Christ!

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To Judge Or Not To Judge – What Does The Bible Say?

Probably the most widely quoted saying of Jesus, and often quoted not only by many Christians but from those who don’t even believe in the scriptures is “Judge not, that you be not judged.” – Matthew 7:1

Frequently it’s used in a context such as: “Yeah, she left her husband, but who am I to judge? After all, Jesus said, ‘Judge not, lest you be judged.’” or “Don’t judge me, Jesus said you’re not supposed to judge”. The idea of being non-judgmental is used as a defence against any assertion that a given person’s behavior is wrong.

Basically, the meaning being presented is “You don’t have the right to tell me I’m wrong.” Ironic given the fact that those who are themselves condemning condemnation are judging others for doing what they themselves are doing – judging someone for being judgmental. In other words, they are ‘judging’ me for ‘judging’ them (or vice-versa).

But let’s get real for a moment. In a sinful world, no community can exist for long where nobody is ever held accountable; no teacher would grade a student’s performance; no citizen would sit on a jury or call a failed leader to account. Modern Canadians however suffer from a fear of judging. Passing judgment on the behavior of fellow human beings is considered an act of barbarous, savage, and uncivilised intolerance.

Why? Because, our culture tells us, we are all flawed, and people with flaws have no right to judge other people’s flaws. Furthermore, the modern westerner does not believe that there are objective standards by which to judge anyways. And where there are no standards, there is nothing by which to measure behaviour.

So, we (society) then seem to agree on a value of allowing everyone to do what is right in his or her own eyes, each person deciding for himself or herself what is right or wrong, telling each other through our social media’s to “tolerate” (which in their minds essentially means “celebrate”) sinful activities. In fact, the sentiment today is that if you don’t ‘celebrate’ a particular sin, you are then automatically condemning those who are. Those who take seriously the biblical warnings against sin and dare speak out against evil are written off as religious fanatics, and ironically “judged” as being “judgmental.”

So the average westerner now walks through their lives telling themselves (and anyone else who will listen) that they’ve evolved to a place of non judgmentalism. And because they are now so enlightened, they have risen above the need to commit the sin of judging others.

The reality though is that you’re only lying to yourself when you say that you don’t judge people. Yeah, I get it, you have Tupac’s “Only God Can Judge Me” tattooed on your upper back, but I guarantee you judge people more than you think. Everyone does it, so let’s stop beating around the bush and stop acting like we’re not engaging in the guilty pleasure. Let’s not judge others when we deem it necessary on our part, and then hide behind culture’s politically correct mantra to not judge others.

When Jesus said not to judge others, he didn’t mean that no one can identify sin for what it is. In fact, Jesus gives a direct command to judge in John’s gospel, “Stop judging by mere appearances, but instead judge correctly” – John 7:24. Ok… so it appears that Jesus says not to judge but then he gives instruction about judging correctly. What to do? To Judge or not to judge? Taking this verse from John and some others in their proper context’s, what we discover is that it’s not the judging that is discouraged, rather it is the type or motive behind the judgement.

1) Hypocritical Judgement 

Jesus follows up his warning against judgment in Mathew 7. “For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you”. Matthew 7:2

That means then that if we can’t hold to the standard we use, we have no business applying that same standard to others. Jesus spoke about hypocrites in Matthew 6 before he subsequently followed it up by a warning against hypocrisy. “Why do you see the splinter in your brother’s eye but do not notice the log in your own eye? … You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly enough to take the splinter out of your brother’s eye.” – Matthew 7: 3, 5

When we point out the sin of others while we ourselves commit the same sin, we only condemn ourselves “Therefore you have no excuse, O man, every one of you who judges. For in passing judgment on another you condemn yourself, because you, the judge, practice the very same things.” – Romans 2:1

2) Self-righteous Judgment

“Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment.” – John 7:24. Simon the Pharisee passed judgment on a woman based on her appearance and reputation, but he could not see that the woman had been forgiven; Simon drew Jesus’ rebuke as a result of his self-righteous judgment (Luke 7:36-50).

Self-righteous judgment is wrong. We are called to humility, “God opposes the proud” – James 4:6 and remember that, “All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags; we all shrivel up like a leaf, and like the wind our sins sweep us away.”  – Isaiah 64:6

3) Harsh Judgment

The thing is we don’t want to be a society of push overs, do we? If life’s tough for us, should we not make it tough for others? Why should they have a free ride? Challenge – isn’t that what life’s all about? As I go down that path, I invariably get caught up short with words like mercy, love, grace, forgiveness, kindness. That’s what everyone wants. Then there’s King David – as tough as they get. To survive in those days and then excel was no small feat. And yet as he lays on his bed he says, “O Lord, please help me … listen to my prayer for mercy.” – Psalm 28: 1-2

It is the merciful who will be shown mercy, “Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy”. – Matthew 5:7

I hate being judged unfairly and harshly – I much rather be shown a bit of mercy. That being the case I need to remember to extend mercy to others, first. As we judge we must remember that harsh, unforgiving judgment is wrong. “Always be gentle toward everyone” – Titus 3:2

4) Right Judgment

Yes, we’re warned against judging others when it’s done unfairly or unrighteously, but Jesus extols “right judgment” “Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment.” – John 7:24.

Truth is, the Christian must “judge” or discern between good and evil, “But solid food is for the mature, for those who have their powers of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil.” – Hebrews 5:14

There must be spiritual evaluations made of the words and behavior of others, not to find fault, but to effectively guard our hearts against error and sin. In fact, Jesus warns his disciples to, “Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves. You will recognize them by their fruits.” – Matthew 7:15-16

In the end do we judge, or don’t we? Yes, we do. But the true disciple of Jesus, judges in love. Love requires that we gently confront those in error with the truth about their sin with the hope of bringing them to repentance and faith, “Whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death.” – James 5:20

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When a Loved One “Comes Out”

Hayley Mullins | Homosexuality & Gender Issues

 

Dear sister, perhaps you just received some surprising news.

It could be that your son just showed up at the front door and said, “I’m gay.” Perhaps your sister introduced you to her partner today. Or maybe the friend you’ve known for years tearfully revealed she’s struggling with same-sex attraction. It could be that someone you know is “transitioning,” going by another name and gradually changing their appearance to reflect the opposite gender.

If any one of the scenarios above resembles yours today, you may be feeling despair, ashamed, frustrated, wounded, confused, guilty, betrayed . . . or even angry with God. But in the midst of your emotions and uncertainty, God’s Word offers hope-filled answers for you today.

Seven Truths to Consider

1. Being “quick to listen, slow to speak, slow
to become angry” is always a wise reaction.

It is easy, when emotions are high, to either lash out in anger or (in the name of love) to start throwing out Scriptures toward your loved one. Though sharing truth is right at its proper time, consider it may not be the first thing God is asking you to do. In the heat of the moment, the Bible gives us another way to respond—the way of wisdom:

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God (James 1:19–20).

The Lord, through James, tells us that a quick, emotional reaction will not change your loved one’s heart. Instead, your efforts to listen to them patiently may be what God uses to help them.

Their decision to tell you probably wasn’t made overnight. It’s more possible that they’ve been wrestling for a while . . . and have been experiencing some deep pain. They may even be expecting you to reject them. Letting them share honestly lets them know they are heard and loved—and will actually help you minister to them better. Their situation may not actually be what you assume, and the Scriptures you initially think they need may not be helpful for their struggle. Are you willing to wisely listen before you speak?

2. Regardless of their choices, your loved one is
made in God’s image and has value and worth.

Here’s some deep, beautiful doctrine: God has graciously placed the imago Dei (image of God) in every person (Gen. 1:27). From the Garden of Eden, each man and woman has been given the privilege of reflecting God and His glory in Creation. Yes, sin—including sexual sin—has caused that image to be displayed imperfectly. But every human being is endowed with the gift of dignity, value, and worth in the eyes of their Creator.

That’s true for the ones who seem most violent and inhuman and the young baby who cannot yet consciously choose to disobey God’s law. Our enemy wants you to forget this truth so you’ll reject and disrespect your loved one . . . because Satan hates God and all who bear God’s image.

Your son changing his name or your cousin coming to Christmas dinner with a same-sex partner doesn’t mean their value before God has diminished. His Creation ordinance still stands—and with it, our need to show all people respect as bearers of God’s image. Recognizing this does not mean approving of all your loved one’s choices, but it does mean approaching them with an attitude of respect.

3. Your and my sin (and need for the gospel)
is the same, no matter our temptations.

We will never fully value and demonstrate the beauty of the gospel until we recognize our own neediness before God. Paul writes about this in Romans. After explaining that God has given His people spiritual advantages, he writes this:

But now the righteousness of God has been manifested . . . the righteousness of God through faith in Jesus Christ for all who believe. For there is no distinction: for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a giftthrough the redemption that is in Christ Jesus (Rom. 3:21–24, emphasis added).

If you hold to the biblical teaching on sexuality and don’t struggle with the same temptations, it can be tempting to look at your friend or relative with disgust. But do you look at your own sin and feel as repulsed? God has offered you grace in Christ—His overwhelming gift of love and blessing—because you needed it and couldn’t earn it. Your sin, whether it’s gossip or overeating or anger, needs God’s forgiveness, mercy, and grace as much as your neighbor’s—and that is true if they do practice homosexuality.

If you’re thinking, I do recognize my neediness . . . and it’s overwhelming!, here’s hope: Your neediness is exactly what qualifies you to help others. As you experience your weakness and God’s grace in it, you can then be a humble, effective vessel of God’s mercy toward your loved ones.

4. According to Scripture, embracing their
same-sex desires isn’t God’s best for them . . .

This is one of the hardest truths of Scripture: God is not honored by sexual relationships between people of the same gender. If you’re reading this post, you may already embrace this truth (or you’re wrestling with it). You know verses like Romans 1:26–27, where Paul describes these acts as “dishonorable” and “contrary to nature.” You’ve read the lists of sins elsewhere in the New Testament where the practice of homosexuality is listed as a mark of unrighteousness (1 Cor. 6:9) and “contrary to sound doctrine” (1 Tim. 1:10).

Yes, homosexual acts are sinful. This statement is true, but it’s very tempting to just stop here. There’s more to the story—and it requires more than simply throwing out Bible verses without love as grenades. (Do you see the ellipsis on the header above? Let the next truth finish the thought.)

5. . . . but obedience to God’s commands
and design can be a very hard road.

Consider the implications for your loved one to follow Jesus in their sexuality:

  • They may have to give up someone they are deeply connected with.
  • They may have to give up their community and identity.
  • They may face deep loneliness.
  • They may have seasons of depression and feeling unloved.
  • They may face misunderstanding in the Church and outside.
  • They will probably battle desires that cannot be fulfilled obediently.
  • They may never have a family or children of their own.
  • They may not be able to enjoy the physical intimacy of sex.

Jesus said following Him would be difficult and full of self-denial (Matt. 16:24). You probably feel some of that “cross of discipleship” each day—praying for a prodigal, feeling rejected by friends who want to gossip, submitting to an unwise decision of someone in authority. Let your experiences give you compassion toward your loved one. If they’re struggling against their desires, look at that list and be willing to ask questions about their fears and pain. And if they are pursuing a same-sex relationship, consider that those may be some of the reasons. Can you enter into the difficulty with them? Is there a way, as their mom or sister or friend, that you can you help provide for some of those needs?

6. God desires and is able to restore what
is broken by sin’s curse—including our
sexuality, but it may not happen in this life.

After that last point, you may be feeling heavy-hearted. But there is hope. God “is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think” (Eph. 3:20). With this truth in your pocket, you can look at your loved one and think, If Jesus is their Savior, He can change them.

That said, while praying and hoping, we have to avoid creating an idol called “completely free from temptation.” God’s plan for your loved one, even if He draws them to Himself, may not mean they’ll experience automatic transformation. They will still struggle with temptation (probably even same-sex attraction). God may have marriage in mind for them; He may not. They could be on a long road of both victories and failings. But the goal is the same for all who follow Christ, whether they experience homosexual feelings or not. God’s purpose for His children is always their sanctification and His glory—not attraction to the opposite gender.

The redemption of our bodies (and your loved one’s sexuality) will not be complete until the day Christ returns. But take heart: In that day, there will be no sin, no temptation, no sorrow, no loneliness, and no pain for all who belong to Him. So as you trust the Lord with your loved one’s situation, remember that He is able to turn it to good, and for His people, He will.

7. Showing Christ-like love means sacrificially seeking
your loved one’s welfare while pursuing God’s glory.

This is where it gets practical and personal. Your loved one (like all of us) needs community, a family . . . and hope. Where better to experience these things than around your dinner table, in your church, and in the everyday stuff of life? This is especially important if they’ve already experienced rejection from others. As you long for their restoration and walk with them, your friendship and love are the most beautiful gifts you can give . . . because it reflects the heart of Jesus.

Our Saviour ate with both the religious and the prostitutes and swindlers of His day. Remember that Jesus didn’t make a distinction in welcoming people into His life based on their behavior, temptations, or lifestyle, as we’re often prone to do. All sorts of people were welcome at His table, because that’s where He taught and displayed the gospel. When the Pharisees questioned Him on the company He kept, He was bold and unashamed:

“Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. Go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, and not sacrifice.’ For I came not to call the righteous, but sinners” (Matt. 9:12–13).

Consider this: If our meals are more of a meeting of self-righteous religiosity than a welcoming feast to a motley crew, are we really reflecting the heart of Jesus? When a loved one says, “I’m gay” or “I’m struggling,” should we not do the same as Christ did—showing hospitality to those who need a family, making room at the table for the outcast, and demonstrating mercy toward sinners?

Perhaps this last truth is difficult for you—it may raise questions in your mind about the implications. Yes, it looks messy. But grace rarely comes in when things are washed-up and clean. You may end up sitting by your loved one’s side in the hospital after a suicide attempt and making room for them in your home (as Rosaria Butterfield once did).

Let’s be honest: Your church friends may judge and look askance at you when your daughter, in a short haircut and men’s clothing, walks through the door. As you show love and share your table with your loved one, you may face the same rejection as Christ did from the Pharisees. But remember, our Lord says, “I came for the ones (including us!) who need my friendship and salvation.” By sacrificing your comfort in this way, you can be God’s means of showing Christ’s grace in the world.

Also know that loving and welcoming does not negate any of the other truths above. We must seek God’s best for our loved ones, which always means honoring Him first. We are never to sacrifice truth, but we also are not to sacrifice love. First John 3:18 says it best: “Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.”

As you work through your own emotions and choose to show Christ’s love, rest in the comforting truths above. And consider . . . our sovereign God is working behind your friend or relative’s confession. They’re sitting next to you for a reason; perhaps you are in their life “for such a time as this” (Est. 4:14).

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Hayley Mullins

Hayley Mullins

Hayley Mullins is a musician by training, a writer by calling, and a child of God by grace. Her passion is helping people find abundant life in Christ through life-on-life discipleship and the written word. She serves with the Revive Our Hearts team in editorial services. When she’s not writing, you can find Hayley chasing adventures in libraries, on hiking trails, and through deep conversations.

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3 Counter Cultural Approaches to Thanksgiving

Today is the day that Canadians celebrate Thanksgiving. Typically, the most common reason for this day is that it is an opportunity to take time out and give thanks and appreciation for what we have.

In Canada it is usually associated with lots of food, turkey, stuffing, football, sleeping, more food, dessert, drinks, family and friends and more food, maybe a sibling fight or two, and the possibility to help serve at a homeless shelter…. Oh yeah, we must not forget the moment when we all share that one thing to be thankful for as we sit around the table, most notably being all the great blessings which we’ve received throughout the year of family, fitness, freedoms, finances, etc.

Now of course that is generalizing, however I think it pretty much summarizes the feel most of us have at our Thanksgiving celebrations. Please don’t get me wrong, I think those things are great (minus the tendency to gluttony and the sibling fight thing), but really, why do we celebrate Thanksgiving? Maybe a better question is what should we be thankful for?

For the disciple of Jesus Christ, I’d like to share 3 non-traditional approaches to being thankful and to what thanksgiving is about, that run counter culture in our world today.

1 We are to be thankful in all circumstances, even in the bad stuff

 “Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” – 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Did you catch that? Give thanks in all circumstances. Thankfulness should be a way of life for us, naturally flowing from our hearts and mouths. That surely doesn’t mean that we should be thankful even during the nasty bits of life – or does it?

We often look to Thanksgiving Day as a day to celebrate all the good things that are going on in our lives and we don’t or won’t talk about the bad stuff. But the truth is that for us Christians we need to give thanks even in spite of the bad stuff.

“I will exalt you, O Lord, for you lifted me out of the depths and did not let my enemies gloat over me. O Lord my God, I called to you for help and you healed me. O Lord, you brought me up from the grave; you spared me from going down into the pit. You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing to you and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give you thanks forever” – Psalm 30:1-2

Here David gives thanks to God following an obviously difficult circumstance. This psalm of thanksgiving not only praises God in the moment but remembers God’s past faithfulness. It is a statement of God’s character, which is so wonderful that praise is the only appropriate response. David always wanted God to receive glory and for God to be made known – to be made famous.

There are examples of believers’ thankfulness in the New Testament as well. Paul was heavily persecuted, yet he wrote, “Thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumphal procession in Christ and through us spreads everywhere the fragrance of the knowledge of him” – 2 Corinthians 2:14

Peter gives a reason to be thankful for “grief and all kinds of trials,” saying that, through the hardships, our faith “may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honour when Jesus Christ is revealed” – 1 Peter 1:6-7

In each of these moments the writer, while in distress is giving glory to God, making him famous. They are revealing a faithful, worthy, amazing God to the world around them in how they react with thanksgiving in all circumstances… even the bad times.

When we react and respond to the stuff going on in our lives, what do we reveal about God?

2 We are to be thankful because of God’s constant goodness, not with my happiness

Paul wrote, “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose”. – Romans 8:28

God works in all things, not just isolated instances, for our good. That doesn’t mean that all that happens to us is good. Evil is prevalent in our fallen world, but God is able to turn everything around for our long-range good.

It’s important to note btw, that Paul isn’t saying that God’s will is to make us happy. Paul isn’t saying, believe in yourself which is the path to realizing that you can be all that God has meant you to be. Nor is he saying that you can realize a better you. No – God’s will isn’t to make us happy, but rather to fulfill his purpose.

Notice also that this promise isn’t for everybody. It can be claimed only by those who love God and are called according to his purpose. ‘Called’ meaning, those who the Holy Spirit has convicted of their sins and has enabled to become disciples of Jesus Christ, and so have a new perspective, a new mindset on life.

A true disciple of Jesus’ trusts in God, not life’s treasures; they look to heaven for their security, not to the things on earth. And they learn to accept, not resent pain and persecution because they have learned to trust in God’s ultimate plan, knowing that God hasn’t stopped being good simply because the circumstances of life surrounding them have become difficult.

3 We are to be thankful because of Jesus’ sacrifice even if my life isn’t fun

If we really understand what Jesus sacrifice on the cross meant we’d naturally become thankful every day and live lives full to the brim with gratefulness even if our lives seem to be heading south, because Jesus sacrifice gives us an eternal picture when understood, that clearly sees the future with him, taking our focus off the temporal today. In fact, this is precisely why we celebrate the Lord’s supper. It is a thanksgiving celebration if there ever was one.

The Last Supper was both a Passover meal and the last meal Jesus had with his apostles before his arrest and subsequent crucifixion. One of the important moments of the Last Supper is Jesus’ command to remember what he was about to do on behalf of all mankind, which was to shed his blood on the cross thereby paying the debt of our sins.

Keep in mind that this tied in with the Passover feast which was an especially holy event for the Jewish people in that it remembered the time when God spared them from the plague of physical death in Egypt.

The Last Supper was a significant event and proclaimed a turning point in God’s plan for the world. In comparing the crucifixion of Jesus to the feast of Passover, we can readily see the redemptive nature of Christ’s death. As symbolized by the original Passover sacrifice in the Old Testament, Christ’s death atones for the sins of his people; His blood rescues us from death and saves us from slavery.

“And He took a cup, and when He had given thanks He said, ‘Take this, and divide it among yourselves. For I tell you that from now on I will not drink of the fruit of the vine until the kingdom of God comes.’ And He took bread, and when He had given thanks, He broke it and gave it to them, saying, ‘This is My body, which is given for you. Do this in remembrance of Me.’ And likewise the cup after they had eaten, saying, ‘This cup that is poured out for you is the new covenant in My blood’” – Luke 22:17-20

Jesus’ was linking his death to the offering of the Passover sacrifice. The Passover lamb was the animal God directed the Israelites to use as a sacrifice in Egypt on the night God struck down the firstborn sons of every household.

This was the final plague God issued against Pharaoh, and it led to Pharaoh releasing the Israelites from slavery. After that fateful night, God instructed the Israelites to observe the Passover Feast as a lasting memorial.

Just as the Passover lamb’s applied blood caused the “destroyer” to pass over each household, Christ’s applied blood causes God’s judgment to pass over sinners and gives life to believers.

“For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” – Romans 6:23

As the first Passover marked the Hebrews’ release from Egyptian slavery, so the death of Christ marks our release from the slavery of sin.

“For while we were living in the flesh, our sinful passions, aroused by the law, were at work in our members to bear fruit for death”. – Romans 7:5

When we recognize the nature of our depravity and understand that, apart from God, there is only death, our natural response is to be grateful for the life he gives.

As our society becomes increasingly secular, the actual “giving of thanks to God” during our annual Thanksgiving holiday is being overlooked, leaving only the feasting.

May God grant that he may find us grateful every day for all of his gifts, spiritual and material. Remember as we celebrate this season that God is good, and every good gift comes from him. May he find us to be his grateful children.

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What to Do If You’re Chronically Frustrated at Church

September 14, 2017                                                  by: Brett McCracken

Stopping the Cycle of Discontent

We live in an age of constant dissatisfaction. Because of our digital connectedness and access to everything all the time, we have never been more aware of the “other options” at our disposal and how what we have stacks up against what we want (or what Instagram or Facebook reveals that others have). Furthermore, the deeply ingrained nature of consumerism tells us to never settle for what we have but always to strive for more and better. And so we live in a constant state of glass-half-empty unsettledness, hyperaware of what could be a better fit for us, what might make us happier and more comfortable.

This attitude is everywhere, including in our churches. Most of us can relate to feeling unsettled and a bit disgruntled in our churches. The reasons are manifold. The pastors never seem to speak to the current-event topics that occupy your mind and stir your heart. The worship band always adds annoying contemporary additions to perfectly good old hymns. Your suggestions for social justice initiatives or small-group curriculum never gain momentum. Everything about the church is just so predictable. Week after week it’s the same thing. It doesn’t feel relevant to what’s happening in the world, at least as you see it.

Could it be that our own self-centered approach to church is the problem?

These feelings of frustration are aggravated by the constancy of media, which bombards us with images and ideas and other stimuli that are dynamic and always changing. Any church would feel stifling and boring by comparison! Furthermore, the nature of social media is predominantly negative, conditioning us to view the world through the lenses of grievance and complaint. We naturally bring these lenses to bear in how we see our church. We have eyes to see what’s wrong, but no patience to dwell in the goodness of what’s right. What starts as small nitpicky things grow in our minds over time, snowballing to become larger grievances that eventually become deal breakers. We slowly disengage from the church, from a place of bitterness and anger, or we just leave.

How can we stop this cycle? Rather than letting dissatisfaction fester to the point that we leave the church or become embittered, what can we do to deal with our frustrations?

1. Search your own heart.

The pervasive “culture of complaint” in today’s internet age has led us to focus our anger and frustration externally, blaming this person or that institution for the things that are wrong. But what about us? What role is our own sin playing in our disgruntled state? Could it be that our own self-centered approach to church is the problem? Perhaps we should start where G.K. Chesterton starts when he answered the question, “What is wrong with the world?” with two simple words: “I am.”

2. Focus on God.

Sometimes we get so caught up in the nitpicky particularities of church that we forget what it is all about. We are there not to be comfortable, nor to be affirmed in our preferences. We are there to worship God; to hear from him; to proclaim his glory and to rest in his goodness. Choosing this posture can go a long way in softening our edginess about church. Don’t look inward in worship, rehashing bitterness in your heart. Don’t look around you either, finding fault in what your fellow churchgoers or leaders are doing. Look upward to God. Focus your gaze on him. That’s why you’re there.

3. Talk to your leaders.

Another unfortunate way social media is changing us is that it frames our complaints in a distant, anonymous, decontextualized way. We air grievances with the ease of a tweet, with the protective buffer of screens and distance, but we rarely do the harder work of hashing things out in person, in longer, more nuanced, and more civil conversations. But this is crucial in a church community.

If you have problems or grievances about the church, talk to your leaders in person. Emails aren’t the best. Texts are worse. Ask them for a meeting, one where you do as much listening as talking. Frame your issues not as demands or critiques but as observations and suggestions. And approach it all in a spirit of love and edification. This is not about you and your comfort; it’s about you as one member seeking to strengthen the whole body.

Brett McCracken

Brett McCracken is the managing editor of Biola Magazine at Biola University and the author of Hipster Christianity and Gray Matters. He writes regularly for the Gospel Coalition website, Christianity Today, Relevant, and his website, BrettMcCracken.com.